Pieces of India, and March Challenge Check-in (belated)

(Due to internet issues my Week One check-in is a few days late... thankful for grace!)

March Challenge Check-In, Week One:

Lights out by 9:30pm: 5/7 evenings (blame the other two on too many great blogs! And lack of self-control… working on that one)

Up by 6am: 5/7 mornings (blame the other two on sick kids and wet beds)

Journaled: 6/7 mornings

Exercised: 5/7 mornings (definitely used my 5 minute plan a few times!)

Worshiped: every day (a couple mornings I just put worship music on during breakfast and sang with the boys)

Getting there slowly… I feel so encouraged just having a goal and a plan in place, and I already feel more rested and more at peace in my spirit.

And as a reward for my labors last week in James’ absence, here are the “pieces of India” he brought back for me...food for our love, and food for my beauty-loving soul.

{a grace-filled postscript}

Ok, so maybe “NO EXCUSES” in big capital letters was a bit hard-core. I guess I’ve always been an all-or-nothing kind of girl. In re-reading my last post (in response to kind, grace-filled comments by a good friend and mentor) I can see I did come across rather militant!

Well, if I’m going to start a new habit, I do need a good plan. I need good motivation. And most of all, I need accountability. I guess flinging this March Morning Challenge out into cyberspace and committing to regular updates in this space is one way for me to keep myself accountable. This early-to-bed, early-to-rise is something I’ve been wanting to adjust in my life for a long time-- ever since before my kids were born, actually. And I finally feel like this year, in this season, God has given me the doable combination of a realistic goal, good tools, and good motivation. I might actually get there. I’m excited.

In her note full of love, my friend asked a beautiful, appropriate question:

“Can you give yourself the grace that Jesus gives you?”

In other words, where is the grace in all of this challenging and charging? Where is the rest? Where is the abiding in Jesus and enjoying His presence all day long? Can I live in His grace enough to be kind to myself the way He is kind to me?

Recently, the word grace has been mysteriously appearing over and over. Paired with this March Challenge, it's another thread God is weaving in and bringing to my attention. Apart from my friend’s email this afternoon, my most recent "grace" sighting was this morning, in a local acquaintance’s car en route to a friend’s house in a neighboring town. Perched on the dashboard of the car was a round glass container probably containing air freshener, if the car’s pungent atmosphere was any indication. Printed in a ring around the glass (and remember, we are not in an English-speaking country) was a string of English words. The only word I could read clearly, lit up by sunlight streaming in through the right-hand side of the car was… you guessed it… GRACE. I am not kidding.

Even - maybe especially - in taking on new challenges, there is always grace.

From a fabulous book I’m devouring (in my new, quiet, morning hour):

Jesus said, “Come to me...and I will give you rest” (Mt. 11:28)

So how do we go to Jesus? How do we get the peace and rest that he promises? In the cacophony of voices that shout for our attention, how do we discern which is his?

Hearing God’s voice requires a new way of listening, a new way of seeing. In my life that perspective was often provided by the chaos itself. When I am able to see difficulties and everyday struggles as God’s way of honing my character, I am better able to appreciate the lessons that life’s messy and chaotic moments have to offer.

But that is only half of the equation. If I intentionally withdraw from the chaos on a regular basis, I am a more patient mother, a more loving wife, and a gentler person. By spending time alone with God, I allow him to care for my soul so that I can better care for those he has entrusted to me.

And later on, in her chapter on Solitude, Keri writes:

As the mother of young children I’m often tempted to give up on solitude or meditation. I can’t do those disciplines, I think. I’m like Jesus, always interrupted with other people’s needs…

So should I just give up on solitude because I am in a serving season of life? It is precisely because we can’t typically get to the bathroom alone that we need times of intentional solitude. Times when we get someone else to watch our kids, draw a line in the sand and say today, for an hour or two or even three, I’m going to be alone with God.

Alone.

Does it seem impossible?

The more it seems impossible, the more you need it.

(quotes from God’s Whisper in a Mother’s Chaos, by Keri Wyatt Kent)

For me, my daily craving for solitude is being filled through committing to and protecting my early morning rendezvous with God. This will not be the same for every young mom. Each of us has to discover (and listen for) God’s specific direction in our individual circumstances. One friend I know listens to the One Year Bible while she nurses her 4-month-old. Another friend uses her kids’ morning video time to have her quiet time alone. God will give us each a different strategy. My goal is to create a habit of doing something every day towards my spiritual and physical health, and... early mornings are a really good goal for me right now.

So.. it’s 9:08pm. My pillow is calling. Keep sending your words of grace, to me and to each other. As my friend said, “Breathe deeply. Breathe in the love of the Holy Spirit.”

Grace. And peace. To you. From God our Father.

(Col. 1:2)

The Challenge Begins

The Motivation:

Being a mother of two toddlers means my days are complicated, messy, distraction-filled, fun, exuberant, disorderly, chaotic… which makes it really challenging - nigh unto impossible - to focus on Jesus, stay patient and loving, plus have an organized productive day, if I wake up with them.

The solution? Get up before they do. Get up to worship, pray, journal, exercise and plan before the troops charge in. Which means... I have to go to bed earlier, because I LOVE (and need) my sleep. To feel rested, I really need at least 8 hours of sleep in America and 9 hours in Central Asia (because life is just that much harder). Glad that I know this about myself… too bad I also love to stay up late and work on projects or click on just one more wonderful blog, which means I’m always groggy in the mornings, which is why I’ve labelled myself “NOT a morning person”. The thing is, I’m not sure that’s exactly true-- I have this sneaking suspicion it’s a bit of a cop-out. And these are desperate times.

So...

The Challenge:

One Month (March 1-31, 2011) of Maximizing My Mornings.

IN BED BY 9PM, LIGHTS OUT BY 9:30PM, UP BY 6AM (or earlier).

NO EXCUSES. NO EXCEPTIONS. JUST DO IT.

The Contender:

Me, a self-proclaimed NON-morning-person and mother of two preschoolers.

The Plan:

6:00 up, journal 3 pages stream-of-consciousness (a strategy for unblocking creativity from a book I’m going through)

6:15 exercise 20 minutes to a video (my only option right now since it’s below freezing outside), while listening to worship songs.

[IF DESPERATE, do Kat’s 5-min exercise plan: 10 push-ups, roll over and do 10 bicycle crunches, stand up for 10 squats (about a minute). Repeat 5 times! DO SOMETHING to exercise every day. That's what forms the habit.]

6:35(ish) Read the Bible chapters for the day from John Kohlenberger's chronological Read Through the Bible in a Year book; journal one thought and one prayer for application. Pray for my children and my husband using Kat’s monthly prayer guides.

6:50 Spend the last 10 minutes looking over the day, choosing a dinner plan, writing to-do lists. Commit the day to Jesus.

(The goal is to push back that 6:00am wake-up time by 5 or 10 minutes each week, so that by the end of the month I’m at ::gasp:: 5:30AM?????!!!)

The Fears:

I haven’t consulted my husband about this yet… what about movie date nights?

(Start the movie RIGHT after the kids go down at 7:30 - leave the dishes - as long as the movie is 2 hours or less, I can still be in bed with lights out by 9:30.)

What about late night phone calls with my mother?

(Call her in the mornings, chaotic kids and all-- keep it short and sweet.)

What about my overflowing email inbox?

(Leave it! The important emails will get dealt with, and a bit of invisible disorganization for a month isn’t going to kill you.)

What if I miss a morning? What if I ::gulp:: FAIL?

(Just keep going. Start over. Go to bed early that night. Do your 5 minutes of exercise anyway, whatever time it is. Get your kids to do it with you. Don’t get discouraged… What's that saying? Rome wasn't built in a year? Well, a habit isn't built in a day.)

NO EXCUSES. NO EXCEPTIONS. JUST DO IT.

Day 1

How’s it going? Terribly. I went to bed an hour late (10pm) last night because I was getting ready for this morning. Great. Then Will had a screaming fit at 1:00am (wet his bed and was half asleep), and woke Ben up who also started screaming. Great. Then Will was up again at 4:00am to pee and couldn’t manage his pants. (My husband’s out of town this week so I’m on day and night shifts.) So… we are all cranky and tired, I didn’t get up until the boys woke me up after 7:00am!!! Fantastic Day 1, right? Really setting the standard.

BUT I did manage to do my journalling while the boys played in their room before breakfast; I did my Bible reading and praying while finishing my pancake after they left the table; AND and I did a whopping half of Kat’s 5-min exercise routine (that was all my poor pathetic muscles could handle! Sheesh!) in my bathrobe. Which I’m still sitting in. But it’s SOMETHING, right?

So. Nap this afternoon (can’t wait). Early bed tonight. Try again tomorrow. The going is the way. Right?

Right????

Most of these ideas came from Kat @ Inspired to Action. Here are some of my favorite things she is offering:

Link to Maximize Your Mornings free ebook

Link to Kat's HelloMornings challenge

Link to a Wife's Prayer Calendar: Praying for Your Husband

Link to a Mother's Prayer Calendar: Praying for Your Children

why {bed by 9pm} is so maddeningly elusive

To all you young moms out there who find getting up early (or just getting up) nigh unto impossible:

Does anyone else find your rising time extremely contingent on your bed time? Like me, have you found a big difference between days started early with Jesus (while the house is still and quiet) and days you're plunged into with the first "Mommy I have to go pee-pee" or "Mommy, I'm hungreeee!" ?

By the time the kids are in bed and I clean up the kitchen, it's 8:00. That leaves me (if I stick to my goal of being in bed with a book or my Bible by 9:00) with 60 delicious fleeting minutes in which to:

-connect with my husband...

-visit a friend who doesn't get home from work until 7pm...

-check email (and decide how many to actually answer)-- or flag it altogether...

-actually read my emails...

-post here maybe? or write a post for later?

-click on just one more website...

-wait for our incredibly slow Internet and bemoan the wasted minutes slipping by...

-buy things on Amazon... or do any other online business (and isn't our whole life lived online these days?)

-call my Mom, or a teammate, or a neighbor...

-read just one more chapter in a compelling book...

-maybe watch something to unwind?

-take a shower? (novel idea!)

and a myriad of other projects that never make the short list but hover persistently in the back of my mind...

What to do? How to put the lid on, seek the important over the urgent, use my evenings to unwind and relax, and still get enough sleep to wake up rested before the kiddos?

I don't have the answer yet... praying for wisdom... I'm just staring good and hard at the "whys", hoping knowing why will lead to knowing how to succeed at this life-altering, day-transforming discipline of:

early to bed --> early to rise --> to start my day quietly with Jesus (Who fills my cup and bathes my heart in peace) --> so I can love my boys and serve my family with pleasure, patience, and peace...

Any ideas?

when sneezing is a blessing in disguise

Gripe keldi ("greep"). The flu has come. Ben, me, almost Will, hopefully not James... one by one we're falling prey to itchy-sneezy-scratchy-throat-drippy-nose-miserable-stuffy February colds.

Today was a stay-at-home-watch-lots-of-TV day, and I thought I'd feel depressed and out of sorts all day. Actually, I was pleasantly surprised. My body being subdued and quiet, I let myself take a day off from laundry, dishes, cooking, tidying up... and I realized how much rest there is in just sitting quietly and playing with my boys. Setting myself free to enjoy them. Eating Cups-of-Soup and toast for lunch, thawing lasagna for dinner, watching kids programs and playing with trains.

Sometimes our bodies and our souls just need a day off. A day to sleep in late, take long naps, leave the chores til tomorrow (they'll still be there-- what's the rush?). And that's when we reconnect with time itself, the flow of it, the fact that in the grand scheme of things one 24-hour day is not really that important (in the laundry sense), and at the same time is vitally important in the don't-miss-a-moment-of-your-kids-growing-up sense.

When I flipped open my computer just now, there was a post quietly slipped into my inbox. Reading it, I felt my soul relax. The remnants of guilt for my sink full of dishes and my laundry basket piled high dissolved away. I read about big boys who once were little like mine, about time being a river, about learning how to slow down and attend to each moment. And the two little "flashing instants" I am mothering are metamorphosing before my eyes...

So I'm thankful, actually, for my sneezing, itchy throat and stuffy nose--

they strongly urged me to take the day off to pay attention.

Other links I've enjoyed lately:

If you're feeling like quitting... come and read this and be encouraged.

For more encouragement to play... read this and be inspired.

Dear Aunt Susanna...

I want to tell you a story.

Three weeks ago, on our first morning back in our home here, I rummaged around in a not-yet-unpacked suitcase for the little children's verse calendar you gave me, one verse for each day of the year. I called Will and showed it to him, and said, "Will, this says 'Big Promises for Little People'. Are you a little person?" Yes, he nodded. "Then these are God's big promises for you!" Big smile. I pulled him up on my lap and we read the verse for January 23. I read it with him again before naptime, and again before bedtime. And after two or three mornings of starting the day this way, he started coming to find me in the Quiet Chair first thing when he woke up-- still rubbing the sleep from his eyes-- "Mommy, yet's read our verse." Crawls up in my lap, notices the lighted candle, reaches for the little calendar. Watches me follow the words with my finger, points to the tiny reference at the bottom which I haven't read. "That, Mommy-- that." I read it, and explain that's where the verse is found in the Bible. He nods, pondering.

And today-- up at 6:20, wanting to read his verse first thing. Disappointed when I said he had to go back to bed and wait until 7-- never went back to sleep, bounced back in again at 7 for his verse. Wouldn't lay down at naptime until we'd gone in and read his verse. Marched right across at bedtime to read his verse after stories, before sleep.

It's already a part of his life. That fast. He loves that it's his, loves the simplicity of the words, loves the routine, loves having me all to himself three times a day.

Thank. you. so. much.

Love,

Carolyn

my new {favorite} quote

{favorite} not because they make me feel warm and fuzzy, but because her words are the most heart-convicting I have read in a while:

"If a sudden jar can cause me to speak an impatient, unloving word, then I know nothing of Calvary love. For a cup brimful of sweet water cannot spill even one drop of bitter water, however suddenly jolted."

-Amy Carmichael