exercising the gratefulness muscle

Another Monday… and I’m struggling to be grateful.  This gratefulness thing is like a muscle in my heart: when I consistently give thanks, the habit gets stronger and stronger and joy flows steadily, even in inconvenience.  When I stop for a few days (or a few weeks), my heart-muscle degenerates quickly back into mushy complaining, and the world goes back to looking gray and dour.  

Maybe it’s because I’m so “all or nothing” - if I don’t write down a whole list in a day, I just don’t write down anything at all.  And I feel awful.  Bland.  Joyless.  Guilty.  Heavy.

How do I keep strengthening this gratitude-muscle?  What if I gave thanks for just three things a day?  What if I wrote down JUST ONE THING?

The cross of Christ.

My healthy, thriving children.

My faithful, loving husband.

A roof over our heads.

Aren’t these things true every single day?  And couldn’t remembering to give thanks for them spark joy every single time?

I write “Feb 20” at the top of a fresh page in my gratitude journal, and start new today: 

1199. New praise from Kari Jobe1200. Fresh sounds, inspiration1201. WATER RUNNING1202. Living Water1203. Chicken and dumplings1204. A little more energy1205. That even though I keep taking my eyes off of You, You shine out so gloriously that You call me back to You, and I come running

Deep down, under the tiredness and the water issues and the depressing, defeating state of affairs we’re currently walking through, I can feel the joy-trickle start.  

He never changes.  

He is always the same.  

He is always Joy Himself, Joy-filled, and able to Fill with Joy.  

*****

What do you do to exercise your gratitude muscle when you just don’t feel thankful?

counting the hard eucharisteo

Counting the hard eucharisteo.  This is not easy.  At. All.  It’s hard.

In fact, naming frustrations as blessings is completely upside-down and counter-intuitive.  Did I mention, really hard to do?

I wrote this list down in sheer, dogged obedience to the hard eucharisteo, believing Ann’s insistence that ALL is grace, not just the nice poetic moments:

“Thank you, God, for…

1041. Criticism 

1042. Being faced with my sin 

1043. Being humbled 

1044. Failing 

1045. That He promises His strength will be made perfect in weakness 

1046. That I’m not perfect (ugh!) 

1047. That life’s not perfect (ugh!)  

 

And it wasn’t until I got that far, and wearily read back over my list with a sigh, that I saw it.  How all is grace.  It stopped me in my tracks.  

I heard Jesus finish each sentence in my mind with a new ending.

So, I obediently wrote them down.  And with each addition, my joy-spring welled higher.

1041. Criticism - because it forces me to grow 

1042. Being faced with my sin - because IT forces me to grow 

1043. Being humbled - because it’s healthy and Christlike 

1044. Failing - because it forces me to depend on God 

1045. That He promises His strength will be made perfect in weakness 

1046. That I’m not perfect (ugh!) - because Christ can be glorified in me 

1047. That life’s not perfect (ugh!) - because God’s glory can be displayed all the more brightly 

1048. That God is determined to grow me in spite of myself 

1049. Grace 

1050. More grace 

1051. A husband who is usually right, and when he’s wrong, admits it

The FACT is: even my most hateful, nauseating sins and the ugly, frustrating fact of imperfection belong on my gratitude list - because ALL is grace.  Each ugliness can be transformed by grace into beauty.  

And, I get to number this daily miracle.  A front-row seat to glory.  

AND, it's proof that I am not just dreaming about growing; I am actually being made more into His image moment by moment, thanks by thanks, “gift” by grace-filled gift.  

Even the moments that don’t look like gifts at first actually are.  

{pictures of a spectacular frost last month}